An Apna Haq service user came to the UK in 2007, following an arranged marriage in Pakistan. She came to live with her husband and in-laws. Throughout her time in marriage, she suffered various forms of abuse (including physical, emotional, sexual, financial etc.). She was never allowed to be on her own, having at least one family member supervising her daily activities. She was not allowed to speak privately on the phone and was denied permission to go to English classes as her husband and in-laws didn’t want her to gain independence.
As a result of this, despite being a UK resident for 10 years, she has little English and little awareness of the legal system and how to get help. She fled her marital home from another town fearing safety for herself and her baby. Via police intervention, she was removed from the abusive situation and escorted to Rotherham. The service user was referred to Apna Haq by a family member who used to be an ex-service user that received support from Apna Haq and recommended our services to her.
Apna Haq supported her with injunction, accommodation, funding, accessing legal support for immigration and family law, accessing benefits, and attending court regarding child contact issues.
One of our advocacy workers says:
“At the time of her application, this lady was not in receipt of any benefits. She had no money, she was new to the area and had never been on her own before and to top it off, she had a young baby to take care of.
“This only heightened her vulnerabilities; her going to court and applying for injunction was very much encouraged by Apna Haq. The in-laws had threatened to harm the service user’s immediate family as she tarnished their honour by contesting in court against her husband. This was a case of violence in the name of honour which I had to educate the solicitor about. The service user was under immense strain as she was worried about the safety of her family, her children and the outcome of the court. We supported her with her safety and getting to court, among other things.
“This is an example of a typical journey a BME woman survivor experiences with Apna Haq. I feel that the service user’s needs are not only limited by the fact that she can’t speak the English language – it’s a much deeper issue of overcoming a 10-year long trauma. She’s a UK citizen and has as much right as any other woman to feel safe. Her vulnerabilities and lack of English should not deny her of her human rights including being empowered and feeling valued as an individual.”
Finding out I was not legally married in the UK
We supported a Bangladeshi lady who was recently widowed. She was married for over 30 years and has suffered from ongoing abuse from both her husband and her in-laws throughout her married life. She suffered from various forms of abuse, including physical and emotional.
She also suffered from regular put-downs as she was unable to produce children and was accused of not being a dutiful wife. She has no children of her own, however her husband had children from a previous marriage. His children lived with them on-and-off from time to time, such as when they needed financial support from their father. She was expected to cook, clean, and see to their needs.
The lady was a carer for her husband prior to his death for over a decade, due to him having severe physical/mobility problems. She singlehandedly cared for her husband without any support from any other family members. During this time, she suffered ongoing abuse in the form of both physical and verbal abuse, and on one occasion she tried to report the incident to the police. However, her extended family intervened and made her out to be the perpetrator instead of the victim and were able to do so because of her language barrier, as she could not speak English.
Furthermore, they accused her of abusing her husband instead as he was disabled and vulnerable, not taking into account her vulnerabilities and isolation. After the bereavement of her husband, she found out that her husband had had left all of his estate to his children in his will, while she was left with an eviction notice to vacate the matrimonial home as she was not the legal owner.
The lady tried to get legal advice in connection to her rights. However, she found out that— even though she had been married to her husband for over 30 years—she was not legally married to him, as there was no legal marriage certificate.
At the time of marriage, her husband had made her believe she was legally married. However, she now realises he had put on a show to make her feel as if they were having a wedding ceremony as she was not aware of how marriages took place in the UK. She believed they were married as they also had an Islamic ceremony at the same time.
She is now in a position where she is undertaking a legal battle to prove that she was married to him. She has been informed that she needs to vacate the property because she has no rights in the matrimonial home, as other family members now own the property.
Apna Haq provided on-going emotional and practical support to the lady by contacting and liaising with solicitors, benefits office, pensions agencies and the housing office.
Having no recourse to public funds left me in debt
I came from Northern Pakistan: I was one of seven children, and came from a poor family, which was trying to make ends meet. Due to poverty, I was pressured to marry somebody who was twice my age. He was British and had previously been married with grown-up children from that marriage, all living in the UK.
When I got married, I moved to the UK on a spousal visa and joined my husband, who had several health problems. He was a pensioner who was frail and consequently did not work. This resulted in me becoming a carer for him. His children from his first marriage used to visit frequently and I was expected to see to their needs as well. Throughout my marriage I cooked, cleaned and was responsible for my husband’s daily needs.
I had four children with my husband and we lived in a 3-bedroom council property. I had never attended English classes, so I did not know the language and I did not have a full understanding of the system here.
When my husband died, I was completely isolated and vulnerable. Due to my immigration status, I could not apply for any benefits in my name, as I had no recourse to public funds. Even my husband’s family – my step kids, severed ties with me.
Due to all this, my rent arrears began to build up and I had no income or financial support. The only source of income I had coming in was the child benefit, which my children and I had to live on. Previously, my husband had dealt with everything financial and legal, so I was unaware of how to do anything. My debt began to build up due to rent, bills and council tax and I did not know how to deal with it or how to find the money to pay it. The landlord even came knocking on my door asking for rent which was a really daunting experience, as I couldn’t even speak enough English to properly communicate with him.
My situation became so dire that I could barely feed my children. Through an acquaintance I was told about Apna Haq. Apna Haq first helped me to apply for the National Zakat fund, and they raised money through the community to allow me to stay in my current property. Apna Haq liaised with the council to pay my monthly rent and council tax using the money they raised. They then helped me to access a solicitor to help apply for my permanent stay in the UK. This is still currently ongoing, and so far, I have been granted discretionary leave to remain and this allows me to apply for benefits.
Apna Haq accompanied me to court to secure my tenancy at the property where I am currently living. They also helped me to apply for all the benefits I was entitled to. I was very isolated before Apna Haq, but they provided me with support to become more independent and settle into the community, so I now have a wider range of support. If it wasn’t for Apna Haq, I do not know what would have happened. I felt like I couldn’t even grieve properly for my husband because I had so many debt issues and worries. Now I am living happily in that property with my four children, without any fear of being evicted.
Returning to an unhealthy environment
A lady came to Apna Haq with complaints that her mother-in-law was very controlling. She felt that, although her husband was a good husband, he tended to listen to his mother. This had been a source of frustration for the service user, and she felt emotionally upset to the extent of feeling depressed. She felt that there was no routine for her four children.
Initially, the service user said that she had had enough and wanted to leave, and asked Apna Haq to find her a refuge to stay in. Apna Haq contacted both the school of the children and social services, and found a place for the service user to stay. This occurred on a Friday. By Monday, the service user had contacted her husband again and returned to the house. She was struggling to cope with the children, who missed their family, so she decided to return as she felt that the children’s needs were more important than her own.
The service user has made no further contact with Apna Haq. The pressure from both the family, and consideration of the children’s needs, can cause a woman to return to an unhealthy environment several times, before she reconsiders leaving. For this reason, re-referrals may occur.
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